SOME Girls and What Makes Them Annoying

So, on this rather dull and depressing night, with a lot to do but with no plans to actually do anything, I sit before the computer and think about how my potential writing career is going down the drain in future because I’m not at all writing these days.

Suddenly, a quote comes into my mind.

“Elizabeth Bennet, is one of those young ladies who seek to recommend themselves (to the other sex) by undervaluing their own ; (and with many men, I dare say, it succeeds.) But, in my opinion, it is a paltry device, a very mean art.”

-Caroline Bingley

Okay, so I greatly esteem and revere Elizabeth Bennet. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to undervalue my own sex (she would never do that either). NEVER.

But really. As feminist as I am, as much as I believe in the might of the girl child, I cannot look past the fact that there ARE girls in this world who are just completely and utterly ridiculous. Like Caroline Bingley.

I mean, after fourteen years of being a girl, I’d wager I’m qualified enough to judge those kinds of girls. And enlighten the human race about a few of their myriad absurdities.

Right?

So I start, with rehabilitated hope about my future in the writing business, to write about SOME Girls And What Makes Them Annoying. (please note that I said SOME, not ALL. Most girls are nice. Like me. Like Jennifer Lawrence. Like JKR. We’re sensational.)

#1: Giggling

Ugggh. The Giggling. ‘Tis a meaner art than undervaluing thy own sex. The girly, flirtatious giggles for ABSOLUTELY NO REASON are maddeningly absurd and very annoying.

#2: Period Talks

Oh God. I understand that that pad you’re using isn’t even good, and that Tampon Company’s jingles LIE, I really, really do, but really? Tell your mom. Not the whole world.

#3: Backstabbers

Meanies. Loyalty is another thing that died along with chivalry.

#4: Lying

A long long time ago, when I was cooing about The Fault in Our Stars, you were like, whatever. Now it’s a movie (and a marvelous and ‘popular’ one at that) and EVERYONE’s read it, you’re all “It’s so beautiful. I cried bucket loads. Blahblahblah work of art blahblah most amazing book I’ve read blahblah cried for THREE HOURS.” When you probably just watched the movie and don’t even know the author’s name.

#4: The overuse of apparently ‘cool’ words just to seem cool

Can someone file a lawsuit against the suddenly predominant ‘word’ ‘lol k’?

I went out to buy a book.

Lol k

My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations.

Lol k.

My dog died.

Lol k

Stupidstupidstupid.

 

#5: OMG I AM SO TOTALLY A BOOKWORM. SEE? I HAVE NERDY GLASSES TO PROVE IT

I’ve come across loads of these girls. Wearing nerdy glasses and talking about how you LOVE TO READ do not make you a bookworm/nerd. ACTUALLY THUMBING THROUGH BOOKS AND LOVING THE BREATHTAKING ONES TO PIECES makes you a bookworm.

I mean, why the sudden need to appear nerdy? Is it not ‘uncool’ anymore?

Well, anyway, you want to look like a witty bookworm? Why not start with remembering that J.K.Rowling is a WOMAN and NOT A MAN.

 

This is getting me all riled up. And tired.

So that’s it.